With so much heartfail and angst around at the moment (hello, have you read “Just Wait” lately!), I really needed a good laugh to bring me back to reality – and this little fic delivered in spades. It was quick to read and laugh out loud funny – really! – like other members of your household staring at you like you’ve finally cracked funny. It was a breath of fresh air and the one-liners are gold. Haven’t had so much fun in ages. I don’t know why this hasn’t been rec’d. It’s only got about 118!!! Deserves more.
Bella works in a cube, for a company, answering emails. She’s a squiggle, not a square – so the cube is not really her thing. Her brain filter is set to “off” and consequently the most outrageous things often come out of her mouth. Edward sure looks like a square, but can Bella get him to reveal his inner squiggliness? Edward’s sexual history comes back to haunt him and the hilarity ensues. No-one remains unscathed once Bella swings into action to claim Edward and preserve his honour.
Bella brings us into the mind-numbing world of The Cube.
Those who have worked in the soul crushing environment of office life will delight in the world of this story, the quirky characters that inhabit it, and for the love of god, our crazy-assed, funny narrator, Bella.
Bella is truly a squiggle in a world of squares. Her days are so mind numbing that she finds little ways to liven them up:
I didn’t really have a dog, I found the picture online and thought it was cute, so I put it in a frame and called it my dog, Sami. It sits next to the picture of my two sisters, which I don’t really have, either. I tell everyone I’m adopted, but they love me as if I was their actual sister. In reality I’m an only child.
We meet her coworker Edward, who is so neat that Bella is convinced he is a serial killer. But he’s actually the son of the boss. And don’t be put off by the T rating — oh yes, there’s sex. It’s just not graphic and anatomical in its description. Following sex there is drama, but it’s captured through the quirky lens of Bella’s dry humor, where even pissed off, Bella is highly entertaining:
I struggled to find the perfect thing to wear. It had to say I was good in bed, and he would never experience it again. It also had to say I didn’t need him and some ugly, frigid woman could have his babies. And the final requirement had to be something that said, if it was all a misunderstanding I forgive him and wanted to do him in the car at lunch.
The whole gang is there: Alice is a coworker, Rose is her roommate, Jasper is her boss, Emmett works in the company’s warehouse. Bella seems to be the only one who can think outside of the box, so she is the go-to for hatching creative schemes. I love how everyone tries to confide in a Bella who is incapable of listening! LOL
“Bella,” Eric said as he rolled his eyes at me, “Don’t you listen to anything?”
I had an epiphany…I never listened to anything… But, surely it was an inherited problem, squiggles don’t listen, and forcing myself to do it would be the same as trying to be a square. My entire body shuddered at the thought. I heard laughter and looked over to see Edward, ah, and Eric laughing together, damn it, I should have listened to what they were saying.
Bella is infinitely entertaining. Girlfriend can never seem to remember where she works or what they do. Just that she’s a squiggle of a girl trapped in a world of squares.
Mr. Marcus smiled at me and shook his head, people do that a lot to squiggles, but we don’t mind because the joke is really on them, the stupid squares.
All you fellow squiggles will love seeing one of our own redefine the shape of the world around her. It’s a quick, fun read and it’s complete.
Sdfreeze has also written a continuation of the world of these characters called Tilt, which is also complete.
EDIT: She has just released a third part, Drift, making it a trilogy.


...celebrating Twific by fanfic'ing it!
It’s actually the 1st story of a trilogy: “The Cube,” “Tilt” and finally, “Drift” – all 3 are complete.
Sdfreeze actually is a *fast* updater. On my experience w/ “Drift,” she completed posting the entire 15 chapters plus an epilogue in a span of 4 days! I was very, very impressed.
Sadly, Sdfreeze is currently on “hiatus” writing fics, as she stated on her A/N on the epilogue of “Drift.”
Thanks wolffia!
I just updated the post to include the third part
I love this story and its sequels and I have been reccing it wherever and whenever I can. I absolutely loved this story . I was so sad to see it end, Sdfreeze really knows how to make me laugh. I especially loved how the jokes were carried throughout the trilogy, like the sisters being mean to Bella, chair sex and the squigle pen. Sdfreeze should be writing for Saturday Night Live, she has such a fantastic sense of humor. These stories should have reviews in the thousands, they are so funny. They are all quick reads and if you are looking for any kind of a pick me up, give these stories an hour of your day, you will not be disappointed!
I also love, love, love another one of her stories, Reviews to Die For. It is not as snarky as The Cube but written in a darker style. The premise is so unique, it reminds me of an episode of Psych. Sdfreeze is taking some timeoff from writing and I would love to see her come back with more comedic genious like The Cube.
Sd freeze just update new story for the cube ; Soar.. I think she can’t stand on hiatus..she is amazing author, all her stories are complete and very very good.
i read this story like a few weeks ago and i’ve been trying to find it again for the last like 3 hours. i finally just stumbled on your recc, but fanfiction is saying it’s not there anymore. do you know what happened to sdfreeze’s stories??
i really want to read the continuations
Hi, I’d love to help you find SDfreeze’s stories. They can be found at her new blog here:
http://suddenly-sandi.blogspot.com/
I love to continue to push her stories. I found the Cube series to be one of the funniest things I ever read and it brought me such joy!
A few days ago I was in your shoes looking for her stories.
Her stories were pulled against her will and you can find out details by reading these:
http://www.adifferentforest.com/Campfire_Comment.aspx?ID=9961
http://www.adifferentforest.com/Campfire_Comment.aspx?ID=9815
I hope this helps and I am sure she will be happy to see you.
The Cube, but maybe you know what happend with Players Sdfrezze?
What happened to Sdfreeze’s stories? I hope she finds them again…
The cube and the others are some of the funniest stories I’ve read on fanfiction… I can only hope that Sdfreeze will return.
Just thought I’d put this here, in case anyone doesn’t know, but Sandy’s stories were pulled, as said above, without her permission, but some of her devoted readers are now reposting them all on fanfiction.net under SDFreeze. I hope it’s okay to put the link here (sorry, I don’t know how to make it as an actual link, so unless someone can tell me how, you’ll have to copy & paste):
http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2775373/SDFreeeze
They are slowly, yet surely, posting all of her amazing stories, so be sure to check them out. She also has a blog (http://suddenly-sandi.blogspot.com/) that she posts to intermittently. She’s gone through quite a bad time lately, and doesn’t have regular computer access right now, but is able to post on the blog here and there. While I don’t know her personally, I can tell she’s an amazing person as well as a superb writer, so I hope everyone who reads this goes and checks out her wonderful stories. There are a lot of them, so it might take a while to get through them all, but believe me, they’re worth it!